Mental Fragments

Haven’t posted in about a month. I have a few draft posts but didn’t have the time to finish / edit them. Hopefully I’ll be able to post them soon. The past month was pretty busy coupled with many emotional highs and lows. There are so many things in my head now. Sometimes I get tired just by thinking about them. Recap of the past month:

1. We opened our internet cafe. It’s been keeping me occupied on weekends and sometimes up to 1am on weekdays. We’re still on the critical stage since this is just the first month.

2. Went to Bantayan, Cebu last March 8-11 with office friends and had a great time. Tried skim boarding and broke the nail of my big toe while learning. hehe. Here’s the link to our pictures.

3. I’m planning to take a leave from office in May (leave na naman!!!). The reasons for this leave would be a possible family business venture and much needed soul-searching (quarter-life crisis maybe?). I’m a little worried of what might happen during this time. It feels like venturing into outer space but I think I have to do something about it to grow as a person.

For those who know me, please answer my Johari and Nohari windows. Don’t worry about the Nohari, I can take criticisms ;). I’m doing this to know myself better and improve on my weaknesses. Thanks!

Mart, Al (whom I haven’t seen in 2-3 years) and I were having a few beers at Petron Treats near Westgate, Alabang. The place is nice to hang out and have a talk… open air, cool breeze blowing, quiet night with light music in the background. We were having this conversation about making mistakes in life and getting hurt. While I was sharing something about a recent experience, Mart said: "Minsan masarap din masaktan…" ("It feels good to be hurt sometimes.")

He has a point. Sometimes the experience of getting hurt emotionally makes us feel human… that we are vulnerable and we’re not just some thinking machines without feelings.

For most of my life I based my decisions on what’s practical and logical. I considered that emotions would only cloud correct judgment. That everything in life can be calculated and quantified… That everything will be easy if I just follow what’s reasonable.

What I didn’t realize is that in denying feelings / emotion, I was also denying a big part of my being human. Being practical and logical also would not eliminate the fact that we’re not perfect. Mistakes and failures always happen to us. What’s is important is how we deal with it.